When this year started, I had huge, wonderful plans for this blog.
Post three times a week, minimum.
Participate in every free-write flash fiction compilation I could find.
Discuss current submissions out for publication at least once a month.
Maybe even bring some life things into play.
Something about best laid plans should go here, I think.
It’s July 1 now.
Half the year is over.
Lots has happened.
Much of life has been eaten away by being lost in the dark clouds of depression and anxiety.
It’s still less than optimal, really.
But the theoretical clouds do seem to be lessening a bit.
I’m not sure if it’s a temporary lift or something more permanent.
May as well take the opportunity while it’s here.
I’ll work on it.
There’s a chance this will fail marvelously again.
Then again, there’s a chance I’ll actually succeed in posting and writing here.
Also, NaNoWriMo is starting again this Sunday, so I have a reason.
I’m going to try. I can’t promise. But I’m going to try.
Adventures are coming up.
Watch this space.
I didn’t do last week’s Friday Fictioneers. I will admit, I was too caught up in other projects. Which is a shame; the prompt picture was quite lovely. But life had to take precedence.
Life has changed quite a bit in the last five months. The move was just the tip of the iceberg.
So much has changed, just from the beginning of the year.
I haven’t forgotten about this tiny corner of the internet. I’ve been working on projects. Working on family. Life. Writing, always.
We’ve left the bustle of a major metropolis in the valley for a tiny (to me) town, half a mile away from the California coast. I’ve wanted to live here my whole life. It still feels like a dream.
I felt burned out. At the end of my line. For so long.
Now, I feel my wings coming back. Unfurling.
Like a phoenix. I shall rise.
You think about a lot of things when your heart is pounding at 234 beats per minute.
For no reason.
For half an hour straight.
I thought about my daughter. I thought about my husband. I thought about my cats. I thought about my friends.
I was strapped in the back of an ambulance, trying not to absolutely lose my shit as it took three tries toset up an IV, three tries of increasing dosage of Adenosine to slow my pulse to something less deadly.
I wondered if the last thing I would see would be the bags of saline, set up for easy grabbing by the EMTs. Continue reading
I’m slowly starting to come back to surface levels of normalcy instead of fighting to keep my head above water. Here’s a brief rundown of the last month, in handy dandy list form. Continue reading
I don’t make New Year’s resolutions. Instead, I make lists of goals. Resolutions are too easy to ignore; tiny promises left abandoned as the calendar turns. Goals give you something to work toward; something to look back upon when it’s all through and say “Hell yeah, I did that!”
So my goals, so far, for 2014.
(In no particular order) Continue reading